GAD Guide: How to be a Neurotic Writer in 15 Steps

Open notebook with pen and glasses resting on it surrounded by crumpled up paper.

Writing wisdom states: Write what you know. That’s mostly correct. Kind of, I guess. I mean, “write what you know” doesn’t REALLY work. Think about it. How could we have anything science fiction? No one knows hyperdrives or time machines. Or what about fantasy? Orcs, spells, floating castles, no one knows them. Or, take a more realistic example, how could a mild-mannered author write about a psycho serial killer? All she’s murdered are the trees that made the paper she wrote on.

Continue reading “GAD Guide: How to be a Neurotic Writer in 15 Steps”

Shitty Movie Detail: Spider-Man Far From Home

FT, Fartiste Theater's frankenthing mascot.
FT, Fartiste Theater’s frankenthing mascot.

Little Ralphie was so traumatized by the pink bunny outfit, he grew up to be a super villain scientist. This is a subtle nod that homemade clothing from aunts and/or grandmothers are a terrible burden on society as well as the children. Oh, won’t someone PLEASE think of the children!

Shitty Movie Detail: It Chapter Two

Pennywise floating down from Paul Bunyan’s shoulders using a bunch of red baloons.
FT, Fartiste Theater's frankenthing mascot.
FT, Fartiste Theater’s frankenthing mascot.

At one point in the film Pennywise is sitting on Paul Bunyan’s shoulder holding bunch of his trademark red balloons. This is a subtle nod to the foot condition, bunion, a homonym of Bunyan. By using this sophisticated linguistic slight-of-hand, filmmaker Andy Muschietti reinforces how horrible Pennywise is because It can move around, causing pain in areas other than one’s feets.

Shitty Movie Detail: John Wick 3: Parabellum

John Wick at the Continental Casablance.
FT, Fartiste Theater's frankenthing mascot.
FT, Fartiste Theater’s frankenthing mascot.

When John Wick travels to the Casablanca Continental, all the people in the background are clearly human. This is a subtle nod that Parabellum takes place on contemporary Earth, not a long time ago in the Mos Eisley Continental. Therefore, the titular war Wick is preparing for is a regular one, not Star Wars.

Shitty Movie Detail: The Dead Don’t Die

Zelda Winston wielding her samurai sword.
FT, Fartiste Theater's frankenthing mascot.
FT, Fartiste Theater’s frankenthing mascot.

Tilda Swinton being turned into a samurai Scotswoman is a subtle nod that the Blancmange invasion from planet Skyron of the Andromeda Galaxy was not, in fact, thwarted by Mr. and Mrs. Samuel Brainsample back on 30 November 1969!